that...

Let's just be real for a second...I am pretty sure I have said it before...and I stand by it...

I think MOST OF THE TIME...that a prereq for Hostesses is to be COMPLETE a dumbass. Most of the time...well Thumper is an exception to that rule.

She doesn't need babysitting, she doesn't really need guidance...she is a go getter.

She does however need to get in touch with her inner bitch...you know...call on her back bone.

People try to run over the hostesses. They pick up on the dumb or the mildness and they prey on the weak...NOT IN MY STORE.

I have always been told, "you can GIVE your lunch away everyday if you want to...but don't you EVER let ANYONE take your lunch!!"

I walk up to the front on this day when I hear Thumper say, "Heeeeelp..."

A VERY plump young lady was standing at the front wearing an outfit that would SURELY get her nominated to TLC's What Not to Wear. She was my size or better rocking a cami that was designed to be covered up by another shirt...

I'm not hating...I'm just saying...dress your body...

I asked for the down low...

and I got the basics (we operate on our toes...so for now the basics was all I needed)

Party of 7...

So I asked the usual..."Do you guys want to split up right next to each other or would you rather sit together?"

She answered in a very angry big girl sort of way..."We WILL sit together"

So I said, "Ok, give me just a second to go look around and see how long it will be"

And I went on my way...to return in 10 seconds to tell her it would only be about 10 minutes.

I went into the back & Thumper followed me...

Apparently when I walked away to check on the tables she had a Bon Qui Qui moment...and spouted out..."RUDE"

The drunk boy with her responded, "What, what did I do..."

She responded..."Not you...THAT..."

And pointed in my direction...

So I did what any good manager would do...

I assured Thumper that the 10 minutes I originally quoted was a mistake...that it would in fact be 20 to 25 minutes.

I then followed up with my bartender about the EXACT measurements of all of the drinks that they ordered to ensure that he didn't over serve them, or jeopardize our liquor cost.

Let's just say that their Patron Margarita tasted like it was from Jaurez, Mexico...

The next time that hefer comes in she will think twice about referring to me as...

THAT...

RUDE!!!!

Jacked Up

So life is full of jacked up ish...

that is sort of the way it is.

There are all sorts of things that can be deemed jacked up...

Days like today, people parking in a handicap spot that are perfectly healthy, cocky jerks...you get the picture.

Let me tell you about some jacked up stuff...

I once knew someone who was dishonorably discharged from the military...

jacked up...I know...but it was his fault...

then later on he was begging for money as a disabled vet...

EVEN more jacked up...

especially considering he didn't hurt himself in the military...

But all that to say...

I have TWO brothers who served in our military...and I respect the hell out of them.

They are both two hard working, contributing members of our society.

Both very normal.

They don't walk around introducing themselves to people as a vet...or expecting anything.

normal

But this other jack ass...

not so much

This guy comes in about once a week.

and once a week he parks his JACKED up truck...in the handicap spot....

THAT IS JACKED UP!!!

And once a week...I get a complaint that goes about like this...

"anyone who can get in or out of THAT truck is not handicap and does not need to park in that spot"

And I am tempted...sooooooo tempted to tell him to move his truck.

I guess the reason I don't is because the people that are complaining are not handicap and there are still spots available...if a man on a walker had to walk a bit...I would say something.

I am not that jacked up...

I mean really...maybe I am...

this guy doesn't tip that well...and is not that nice...

maybe I should...

but why create unnecessary drama...

well....small confession...

the last time he was in, I had a note written that I was gonna stick on his driver's side door...that commented on how JACKED UP it was that he was parking in a handicap spot...but he left before I got out there...

but no worries, he will be back...and I WILL post the note!!!