Sunday, June 29, 2008

Me No Sabe

That's what he said...

Sometimes as a manager you don't even have to be called...you are just in the right place at the right time. Or the wrong place at the right time...however you choose to see it.

Friday night was just that for me...you can always tell those who don't get out much by the orders they place. Chances are they are going to order a shot of what they consider the best liquor, some form of steak, and bottle beer (no mug)...

Friday was no different.

Two of my busser were in eating...and I was chatting it up with them. My busser on duty was picture happy that night. He wanted a picture of me with the guys...so I obliged...as the flash went off the drunk guy at the table next to us (with the empty shot glass, steak, and bottle beer) screamed at him...

AMIGO....NO BUENO...DON'T TAKE PICTURES...in the most bumpkin Spanish accent possible...I knew this was going to be interesting...so I motioned to the busser to leave him be to save some drama...

I continued to speak to my bussers (in Spanish) at the table behind him. His inability to understand drove him crazy. He kept saying outloud...to himself...ME NO SABE...

His buddies were outside smoking, so I knew he wasn't talking to them...

this was rude for a number of reasons...

A. He was loud
B. He said it wrong
C. Everyone around him was Hispanic...except him and me...Y YO SE

The next time his server came by he asked if he could move, and Mr. Watson gave him the option of the table on the other side of us...he declined...

When his friends came back I thought he would calm down...instead he downed the salt, covered his entire plate with ketchup, and kept shouting ME NO SABE & IM VATOS LOCOS...

he was loco alright...and with that I warned a server to be ready to call the police for me as I dealt with this guy.

I asked him to be quite again. No dice. One of the tables that was sitting around him did not want to leave for fear of him calling them out. The poor ladies sitting across from him were afraid to even make eye contact.

I brought the check over to them hoping they would pay and leave. Instead he bit off more than he could chew...literally...he puked up the bite he just took...

the rest of the patrons chose that as an exit time

I asked him to pay for the bill so he could leave. He asked if I was kicking him out...my response was that if he was intoxicated to the point that he vomited on himself, then yes I was asking him to leave.

He said he didn't puke on himself...when I questioned the vomit on his shirt he quickly rebutted
that the vomit was on his plate and he was still going to eat it. I told him regardless of where it was he needed to pay and leave.

By this time the entire staff was aware of what was going on. The cooks were ready for backup...and servers the same. I am glad I had so many guys on that night. An all female staff would not have handled that the same (no offense ladies)

He handed me a $100 bill and told me to keep the change...and not to give any to Justin/Jason/Steven/Jared...he still couldn't get the name right...I asked his friend (in Spanish) if he was going to be ok...This ticked him off...causing him to yell...ME NO SABE...I F*CK*NG SPEAK ENGLISH...

So I said, YOU NEED TO LEAVE NOW...so he got up in a scary The Hulk kind of way...plate in the left hand and beer bottle in the right hand...So I said, "Sir you can't leave with that beer bottle." So he took it to the head...and then reared back like he was going to throw it at me...I ducked...

I signaled to call the Police

his friend stepped between us and said that he had him...so I let him...if a psycho's buddy is scared of what he could do...then I am backing up and letting him take it...

The guy threw the bottle and left out the back door...tossing chairs around on his way out...once he and his friends were out of the building I instructed everyone to make sure the doors were shut behind them...

I intersected the police call...a patrol car pulled them over right outside the parking lot

The cops had all three guys out of the vehicle talking to them...the ASS was very boisterous, flailing his arms around as he spoke with the officers.

The guy was going to be let go with a Criminal Trespassing Warning, but he decided he needed to run away from the officers when they turned for a moment...two steps into his escape he fell right on his face...and was subsequently arrested.

So the moral of the story is...Well, I don't really have one...So I guess Me no Sabe...

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Resume for Disaster

Our store is a bit different from other stores in our chain. We are in a college town so we get all sorts of people transferring in from different stores...ALREADY TRAINED...

this means a couple of things...
#1 We are NOT hiring servers
#2 We do not have to train
#3 We have so many that want to come here that we can afford to be picky

So today we had a young lady come in and ask our hostess...Are yall hiring...she promptly said no...so the girl said, well I am kind of a transfer...so I walked over to give her the spill...

She said, well it is kind of complicated. I only worked at the other store for one day, and then I decided that I was going to come and take summer classes...but I have a resume...and my manager can fax all of my info over to you. And basically I can work full time until December.

So I delivered our spill...

ok...the way we start this process is that we will need you to have your GM email our GM to give us the green light letting us know that you are in good standings to transfer...after that we will arrange a sit down interview with our GM to see if you are a fit for our store...and we will go from there...

She said, "Well you can call him to fax over my information so that you know I worked there...they said that I can't transfer if I haven't been there for 2 months...and I only worked one day..."

So I said, ok...well, in order to start this we will need you to have your GM email our GM to give us the green light letting us know that you are in good standings to transfer...after that we will arrange a sit down interview with our GM to see if you are a fit for our store...and we will go from there...

she then said, "but I have 3 references from another store...I didn't work there, but they will vouch for me. So if you just call my GM he can fax you my stuff."

So I said again...(I HATE TO REPEAT MY SELF)...ok...well, in order to start this we will need you to have your GM email our GM to give us the green light letting us know that you are in good standings to transfer...that is the first thing that we need to do...if you want to work here then you need to do the leg work. I am not calling your GM.

She said, ok, well there is my information...my GM is sort of stuck in his ways, when you talk to him you can call the cell phone number listed on my resume...

I said well mam, we are very stuck in our ways as well and I will not be calling your GM...should you choose to take the steps that I have mentioned several times before, maybe I will see more of you. Have a great day!!!

After she left I checked out her resume and chuckled to myself outloud...she had a glamor shot on her resume and WAY to much information that does not even pertain to the job she was trying to obtain...

Resume 101...

1. they need to be short, sweet, and to the point
2. less is more
3. ALWAYS make your resume specific to the job you are trying to get
4. Don' t put a pinche picture on it
5. busy = bad
6. don't argue with someone that controls your ability to get hired
7. your professional references that are going to speak for your work ability should be people that worked with you
8. don't write on your resume in pen to fill in what you forgot
9. you have two ears and one mouth for a reason...so you can listen twice as much as you talk...in other words...SHUT UP AND LISTEN
10. don't argue with someone that controls your ability to get hired

So I did talk to my GM about our prospective employee...but only to say...I have posted a picture and a name in the office...

DO NOT HIRE HER!!!!!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Money can't buy happiness...

...but it can sure make you smile

I have a server...Nikki...that is dealing...I mean dealing...

Usually I wouldn't put someone's personal business on blast, but in this case I think she could use the prayers...like I have said before...I change names, but God will knows who you are praying for...

She lost her partner & best friend two months ago...in a very tragic way...and good old College Station was a get away for her. It is a place that doesn't feel sorry for her. It is a place that doesn't look at her and expect her to deal in a particular way...

But no matter how far away from the pain you are...it is still there...

THAT IS WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR!!!

Two days and two months ago Nikki's friend died...and bc it is so fresh this has been a hard week for Nikki...

Today Nikki's friend Mr. Black came in to sit in her section and shine...he ate chicken strips and left his bill with another server and asked him to give it to me...

The credit card had been run for $9.73...and on the tip line was $600.00...

NO TYPO FOLKS...that man left her $600...and a note...the bottom of the card slip said...yes, this is for real...

The note attached said, "I know that you have had a tough week...I hope this makes you smile...you are a great server and an amazing person and I love you!"

That $600 didn't take any of the pain away...and it didn't aide in the mourning process...but it sure did put a smile on her face...and some bills in her pocket...

so no, money can't buy you happiness...but it sure can make you smile!!!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Which CRACK are You???

Some days I am a crack head, some days I am a crack fiend, and some days I just plain want to crack, and everyday...we are crack peddlers...let me explain...

First we will start with the crack head...I am this Crack most of the time. But I am this way naturally...I constantly run around like Im crazy!! Well, truth be told, I kind of am. You sort of have to be to have my job. You are constantly dealing with hundreds of customers in and out of your restaurant...plus your 20+ employees on staff who all seem to call your name at the same time. Restaurants are organized chaos...I LOVE how it all just falls together...

It only falls together if you have the right crack head on the job...

Second we have the Crack fiend. This is almost everyday that you are not a crack head. You come to this job two different ways...rested and rejuvenated or just plain pooped. These days you are a crack fiend...Starbucks, Monsters, Rock Stars (Purple is my favorite), Redbull, Amp'd, coffee...you name it and we want it...like I said before...you have to be a crack head to do this job...

My days go sooooo much better with a vanilla latte from Starbucks...EXTRA vanilla...it is amazing how a little gas can get you a long way...hint hint

Third lets get to those days that you want to just crack

Those days suck.

They are few and far between....but like I have said in previous blogs...when it rains, it pours...

Let me give you my list of things that will make me crack:

#1 Certain servers that shall remain nameless...if you have to question yourself if you are on that list...you probably are
#2 Calling for food runners and no one listening
#3 Laziness
#4 Stupid questions
#5 comps
#6 voids
#7 anyone who approaches me and starts it off with, "don't be mad at me, but..." or "Ok, so it is not as bad as it seems..." or "ok, Im an idiot"

ok...moment of truth...if you admit that you are an idiot...Im not so bothered by it

#8 People who complain for the sake of complaining
#9 Negativity
#10 THE DAMN PHONE...I HATE HEARING IT RING...JUST ANSWER IT

The unpredictable part about the days that you just want to crack is that it can be all of the above mentioned things...or none of them...but for me, it is mostly just #10...when I am having stressful days that always seems to be the thing that just sets me off...that is my trigger

And finally let me explain the crack peddlers that we are...We support a children's hospital at work...it is a great cause...so we sell our servers crack...we not really, but we have Monsters, Rockstars, Redbulls, and more...

I mean, think about it...our servers come in with energy drinks on a daily basis...so we may as well save sick babies in the process of turning our servers into the crack heads that we need them to be to create our organized chaos!!!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

I'm gonna show EVERYBODY

So I was working yesterday and got a phone call...of course they asked for a manager.

You have to understand, almost all of my friends either work or have worked in this biz...my friend Jennifer manages another restaurant in town and I think prank calling her is almost as funny as tripping a toddler. I have gotten her on a number of occasions!!!

I THOUGHT THIS WAS HER REVENGE...

A lady with a sweet Southern twang was on the other end of the phone. She told me that last night she had ordered some chicken strips and she got them home and could not eat them She said that they were too hard. So I automatically knew that she got the new kind with a crunchier batter.

I apologized and told her that there must have been a misunderstanding, because she got the new kind. She replied, "There wasn't a misunderstanding...Lonny knew what I was talking about." This was funny bc she actually called our togo guy by the wrong...but similar name. I have used this avenue before and I thought that Jennifer was jackin my style...

So I again apologized...this is where people build credibility...(I studied communication in school...maybe she did too)...she told me that she had been coming her since we had opened in 1991. When she told me that she started sounding older. I started believing that it may not be Jennifer.

Then she said, "I don't have any teeth...and I can't eat these." When she said it she had that old person vibrato going on that sort of sounded like she was 1/2 way crying...and I KNEW it wasn't Jennifer. I can't pull off saying throwed stuff, but Jennifer would have laughed at that point.

So I started trying to figure out how I could make this lady happy. I offered her another plate. She kept telling me randomly that she was going to bring it up there for EVERYONE to see...

really...you are hording this food...sicko...old people do the strangest things...

I kept telling her that it was not necessary to bring the food back, but she wanted EVERYONE to see it. I kept insisting that we would remake her food...

suddenly she was ready to get off the phone. She told me she couldn't talk to me much longer about this. that she was going to bring the food back...but I wanted to confirm a food order to have it ready for her.

She then said...Im running out of minutes on my phone...ill call you back...BYE

I got off the phone in disbelief...

When Charles got to work that afternoon I told him about the strange call. He said that he dealt with that last night already. That he had bought her a meal last night. I asked him if the lady was sort of crazy...

he said, "I think she is all the way crazy...it was her caretaker that came and got the food & came back to get the other meal."

and it all made sense...maybe she rushed me off the phone bc her nurse was coming...either way...I found humor in it...

AND Im telling EVERYBODY!!!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

When it rains...it pours...

I came in 30 mins early today...I thought I was holding the classroom that was scheduled. My manager had already started it...so I let him rock it out!!

I checked our Guest Experience Measurement...and we did AMAZING this week...which is HUGE because we have been sucking it up pretty well!! Two great things...I thought I was on a roll!!!

About 7 o'clock my cook notifies me that we are out of burger buns...are you kidding me...when we had the pothead on our bread route we never ran out of bread...we were always on point...but since he sold it we are skin and bonesin it...

When I called the rep he said that they were too far out and we should go to the store and get reimbursed...GRRRR

Then then ten minutes later my busser pages me to the dish area...the machine is broken...I did the regular trouble shooting...switched breakers...all that jazz...and no dice...nada

So I called George...I felt bad bc he had to drive from Conroe...but I felt worse for Hugo...we had to set up the three compartment sink and do it old school style.

For those of you that are not familiar with industrial kitchens...a dish machine can be one of two kinds...a high temp machine...that gets the water up to 160 degrees to kill any bacteria...and fingerprints of dishwashers...or a chemical machine, that doesn't have to get as hot bc it uses a sanitizer to kill the bacteria...if the machine does not work...you use a three compartment...the first compartment has hot soapy water...the second has clean warm rinsing water...the third has cool water with sanitizer...

Three Compartment Sink = 3 X the work...0 X the fun!!!

Graceful Jacklyn jetted into the bar to grab some soap for the sink...and bent over at 90mph and smashed my head into the bar...if I didn't want to cry before...I did then...

So me and Hugo went at it...we were washing the shit out of those dishes...and when your staff sees the manager working/sweating..they pitch in...

and they did...everyone from the servers to my salad/nacho cook...


when George got here from Conroe...the trouble wasn't even the machine...it was the electricity to the machine...poor George...

Soooo I call the Electrician...and he comes out...we thought the breaker was bad...it turns out that the mack daddy fuse to the breaker was bad...so we had to momentarily shut off all power to the store...this could potentially cause the whole system to crash and customers to freak...SCARY!!!

But you gotta do what you gotta do...and I needed some sort of a fix so that me and Hugo weren't there washing dishes until 3 in the morning...We did it and it was a success...lights went out for 45 seconds...they came back on...no crash...well, except for one plate...

that managed to slice Hugo's finger almost off...there was so much blood...I don't do well with those kinds of things...good thing Lolo and Hawaii do...they put on the gloves and went to work...I thought he was going to need stitches, but they doctored him up and all was fine...

After that kind of night...I called Gumby's pizza and did a food trade...I had to reward everyone's tough night...and this was the day I chose to wear my new work shoes...whewwwww

The manager pages from the customers can be over within minutes...the ones from your employees can last all night....

when it rains it pours...

good think I carry an umbrella

Monday, June 9, 2008

FDA Recall!!!

If you haven't gotten the memo...FRESH TOMATOES are on recall. So don't eat them from restaurants/markets that haven't pulled them yet...

While you are at it...question yourself about eating at a restaurant that is serving you a product that could be contaminated!!!

This was initially for Texas and New Mexico, but has been extended to the entire US!!!

Today I was at the togo station putting in an order. I hear out of the corner of my ear...Can I speak to your manager...

I looked over and acknowledged her, and told her I would be with her when I was done. I could tell by the attitude that she was channeling in her tacky leopard spandex shirt that she was going to be a fun one.

As soon as I got done with the order I was processing I turned and said, "Yes Mam"

She had her salad open and said...does this portion look right to you. I examined the box and said, "If it is a dinner salad, then yes. The portion is 4oz."

She said that it didn't look like enough. So I offered her our 7oz salad...she said that she was not paying for it. She then tried to bargain...Well since you don't have tomatoes, can't I have some extra lettuce...

Sometimes the Solve part of the LAST model just kicks in automatically so the customer can get the heck out of your face. So I went to the back and put about two more pieces of lettuce on the salad and fluffed the rest. I took it back out (box open) and she said, "now that is more like it"...

While I was in the back I peeked at the order slip...SHE ASKED FOR NO TOMATOES...

That pinche woman just wanted something for nothing...typical!!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

full circle of service

Im am big on consideration...HUGE!!!

You get out of life what you put in...the same is true in the service industry...and not just food...if you are a good tipper...you get service worthy & appreciative of your tip...if you don't tip...you get service of someone that is sick of people like you...and sometimes they show it

My fiancee and I were in a tattoo parlor one day getting tattooed...when the phone rang...someone on the other end of the line asked if they turned 18 at midnight...could they get a tattoo then??? The answer was yes...

The chick hung the phone up and the guy in the chair next to us said...awww cool...a tattoo right when it is legal...I quickly followed up with a...that is soooo not cool...you don't plan on starting to work right at close...

YOU PLAN ON CLOSING!!!

The artist turned and said that my response was one of someone who had dealt with those a-holes before...the art was reflected by the tip

The same rules apply with the opposite, with opening...I don't even give the full spill about how amazing our togo food is in the morning before 9...who calls that early...

Well this day...Marissa did...

I answered the phone...Jacklyn speaking can I help you...

An energetic voice countered with...yes I need to order some party platters...

Really...this early...we don't serve breakfast...I didn't really say that...I enjoy paying bills on time...

I took her order and she asked to have it ready at 10:30...I said, mam are you aware that we don't open until 11...she said yes...(then why are you asking for it at 10:30)...So I said well then mam we can get it ready for you right at 11...she said ok

She got here at 10:45 and came in...(we open the togo door for employees at 10:45)...she complained the entire time she was waiting in the togo area about how long it was taking...I paid her out and she didn't tip a penny

a $400 order...company card...and she doesn't tip...that puts her pretty low on my "I give a shit list"

We got the order together and as she was coming from putting it in her car she was asking someone to apologize for her for her tardiness...again...she was not up there on my list...

She opened every dressing...every box and complained about EVERYTHING...

I helped her carry it out to the car and she was still bitching...at that point I had turned her off...except to see hear her say that she orders from us all the time and this was ridiculous...

#1...I am at work ALL THE TIME
#2...servers & managers remember two kinds of people
#1-->those who tip very well
#2-->those who don't tip at all
#3...I have never seen this woman before EVER
#4...I hope I don't have to see her EVER again

But I did notice that she had a tattoo on her foot...a bad tattoo...all I could think was that she probably bitched about it the whole time...and didn't tip...it showed in her tat

ps...the tattoo shop had a sign that read

Price is determined by attitude...

I WANT THAT SIGN IN MY RESTAURANT!!! That bia couldn't have afforded our food!!!